Mr Meeps was an alcoholic who somehow got a job and family. But that doesn’t mean his life is stable. No, it’s quite the opposite in fact. His wife is sick of his drinking problem, his kids avoid him, and he works as a fast food employee, which obviously means he doesn’t really get paid that much. Needless to say, Mr Meeps has a dysfunctional life. And he his way of dealing with all of this is by constant drinking. “A bit of beer won’t hurt”, he always says to himself. But one can of beer turns into 2 cans of beer, then 4 cans of beer, then 8 cans of bee— you see where I’m going.
One day, he contemplated his life decisions and realized that he should just stop! But he didn’t know how to stop. Drinking was pretty much his life at this point. So he decided to consult a saint. He asked the saint,”O saint, how can I get out of my obsession with alcohol”. The saint replied,”Go into the Forest of Cleansing where the fairy man lives. He shall cleanse you of your sin.”
So Mr Meeps went into the Forest of Cleansing and ironically, it wasn’t even that clean! It was quite filthy! But Mr Meeps didn’t care. He then found the Fairy man. The fairy man said, “Yo, whaddup bitch! I heard you have an obsession with a bit of alcohol. Well only assholes drink 10 cans of beer every one hour. You’re one of those assholes.” Mr Meeps was surprised by how much the fairy man cussed a lot. He soon found out why though,”SacKydz12, the worst writer ever made, changed us from clean goody two shoes to dirty cussing mother f*ckers. If ya really wanna get real advice, first, kill the SacKydz12”.
So mr meeps went to SacKydz12’s house and threatened to take his iPad and eat his donuts. “NO! NOT THE DONUTS!”, said SacKydz12, the greedy fool that he is. “I’ll clean the forest of cleansing”. So Mr Meeps went back to the forest. Everything looked great! It actually looked like the forest of cleansing. The fairy man said “Go back to the saint. You have combated you alcoholism.” On going back to the saint, he saw that the saint was drinking beer. And not just one can, a whole stack! More than Mr Meeps has ever drank in his entire life! Turns out, the saint was actually an alcoholic the whole time.
What the fairy man said was true. Mr Meeps was no longer an alcoholic. But now he was obsessed with something even worse. Donuts.
Also SacKydz12 lied and he ruled the land with his terrible writing skills until he became a mature adult.
Moral of the story: Please, just stop.
J3tjaguar
Woah man that’s deep.
sackydzNG
Thank you for your clearly serious compliment. It took me about 10 minutes to write.